37 Things I Love About My Wife

This week Carol and I are on vacation. For one thing we are celebrating our anniversary. We have been married for 37 years so I thought I would share 37 things I love about her. There are certainly more but it’s a start. Just wait till we’ve been married for 50! 


1. The fact that even though she’s a morning person and I’m a night person she still goes out for coffee with me at night and stays up late to watch TV even if she does fall asleep.
2. The fact that she doesn’t have a competitive bone in her body. (she has 202 competitive bones in her body).
3. The fact that she gave me four healthy, energetic, enthusiastic, athletic boys
4. The way she encouraged them when they were growing up, helping with their homework, rebounding basketballs, attending soccer games, working so they could go to college and soooo much more!
5. The way she has supported me in following God even when it meant moving away from home, back home, away from home and back home again
6. The way she sees our ministry as a calling and a partnership and doesn’t complain when I have one more call to make, one more visit to make, one more card to write or one more change on the power point!
7. The way she helps me build boundaries so I take time for her and for the family.
8. The fact that we can enjoy doing anything together as long as we’re together!
9. The way she takes care of her self and looks in her new black and white dress.
10. The way she prays for me and for our Journey Church family.
11. The way she has adapted to my family and enjoys going out to eat, long meals at the table and hugging everyone when they come in and hugging them again when they leave.
12. The way she tries to “do it all” being a mom, grandma, pastor’s wife, work outside the home, take care of her mom, love her husband!
13. How she meets my needs even at times when she is not in the mood.
14. How she used to let me “rile up” the kids when I came home even though they were supposed to be settling down.
15. How she roots with me for the Buckeyes
16. How good she looks in red. (did I say something like that already?)
17. How she works to make my life “special”.
18. How she still wants to spend time with me even after “all these years.”
19. How she gives 100% to the kids and our grand daughter.
20. She let’s me choose which restaurant to go to for breakfast. (lunch or dinner)
21. How she is always there to build me up and believe in me.
22. How she helps me understand and be understanding of people.
23. How she gets me chicken noodle soup, pears and seven-up when I am sick and then leaves me alone.
24. How she lets me drive when we go somewhere together.
25. How good she plays the piano.
26. How she supported me in front of the kids when they were growing up.
27. How she trusts me and how I can trust her completely, entirely, wholly, and 100%.
28. How she makes me laugh and still laughs at my jokes.
29. How good she smells.
30. How she lets me share with her something I just learned in my reading
31. How she let's me use her as a sermon illustration even if I do have to give her a dollar.
32. How she keeps learning and trying new things.
33. How I can tell her anything and she doesn't judge me but understands and loves me
34. The fact that she is my very best friend.
35. How we still get to cuddle in bed at night.
36. The fact that she married me.
37. The fact that she stays married to me and loves it.

Thanks!

OUCH!

As a pastor I am expected to be a leader. The problem with leadership is that it can either be good or bad. an article in Leadership magazine indicated that pastors are often bad leaders, especially when it comes to modeling humility.

The Barna Group research probed what we pastors do in response to our frustrations and disappointments. They asked “Think back to the last time you felt disappointed or frustrated with people in your congregation. What did you do-if anything-to address the challenges you faced?’ The pastors could mention anything that came to mind. Here are the top ten responses:

Prayed about the issue (37%)
Confronted the issue immediately (34%)
Had someone on ministry team/board/staff deal with the issue (15%)
Looked for Scripture to address, solve the problem (14%)
Sound counsel from someone I trusted (10%)
Talked with the person (9%)
Confronted the issue eventually (9%)
Addressed it from the pulpit/in a sermon (4%)
Had a council/board meeting (2%)
Self-examination (2%) Leadership, Spring 2010, p.72

Sadly the survey found that only 2% took the time to examine themselves. I’m not sure what to say or to do about that. Paul told the Corinthians that the very first thing they should do is examine themselves, 1 Corinthians 11:28. As painful as it may be let me suggest something. The next time you are frustrated or face disappointment with people ask yourself what could you have done different, said different, or even felt different that might have helped in the situation.

Jim Collins, suggests that superb leaders don’t look out the widow to blame others. They look in a mirror to take ownership when things don’t go well. They look out a window to praise others when things do go well. Whether you are a pastor, a parent, or whatever, the challenge is to examine ourselves, to look in the mirror and when we see something we don’t like examine ourselves first, before we judge others. Jesus said, to “first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.” Matthew 7:5. That’s love!

"I was hungry and you gave me no food. . ."

Recently I was challenged by the another quote from Frances Chans' book, Crazy Love. He asked the question, "How would my life change if I actually thought of each person I came into contact with as "Christ." ie the person driving painfully slow person in front of me, the checker at the grocery store who seems more interested in chatting than ringing up my groceries, the member of own family with whom I can’t seem to have a conversation and not get annoyed?" That in essence is the way Jesus wants us to see people, Matthew 25:37-40.

I was actually tested with that this week when I went to see a man in prison. I was waiting in the foyer to see him when they released a man who had been in overnight. They escorted him through the foyer and out the door. Then almost immediately after he left they building, a lady came out with a spray bottle trying to deodorizer every where he had been. He did smell but more than that, he was extremely unkept, unshaven, a bit crippled and elderly. Much to their dismay and a bit to mine he came back in the building and sat down across from me. To be honest I didn't want to talk to him, cause I didn't know what to say. I almost said something about his shoes. They were bright orange slip-on tennis shoes. They reminded me of the soccer shoes some of the World Cup players are wearing so I thought they were sort of cool. I'm glad I didn't say anything though because in the course of the conversation he told me that that they were prison shoes. They had given them to him because he didn't have any of his own. As it turned out he was not only shoeless but homeless too.

I didn't do anything for him, except talk to him. In the end I was convicted as to how I see people who "hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison" Do I see them as a nuisance or as if they were Jesus? Jesus would want me to see them as if they were Him and give them food because they are hungry, water because they are thirsty and something to wear (even if it was orange shoes) because they are naked.

Think You are Getting Old?

Think you are getting old? Well chances are you it’s true. And if you weren’t sure of it here is a list of things that each high school senior have never known or never been without.

1. They have always had Cartoon Network to watch 24 hours a day
2. They have always been able to read books on an electronic screen.
3. There have always been flat screen televisions.
4. Phil Jackson has always been coaching championship basketball.
5. Britney Spears has always been heard on classic rock stations
6. They have never been Saved by the Bell
7. Most communities have always had a mega-church.
8. Nobody has ever responded to “Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.”
9. They have never used a card catalog to find a book
10. The Green Giant has always been Shrek, not the big guy picking vegetables. Beloit College Mindset List http://www.beloit.edu/mindset
Now if you didn’t feel old I bet you do know. Compare that with the top ten things you and I never knew. We never knew. . .

1. a choice in tennis shoes
2. self-serve gas stations
3. seat belts
4. cell phones
5. bike helmets
6. personal computers
7. cell phones
8. ipods
9. DVD’s, DVR’s, ATM’s and BFF
10. and blogs!

Have You Ever Had to Repent?

Have you ever had to repent? I did recently when I came across another quote in Frances Chan's book Crazy Love. In wrestling with how to define success he said, "God's definition of success is pretty straightforward. He measures our life by how we love." (Frances Chan, Crazy Love, p. 93)

How do you love? And more importantly who do you love? Do you love only those who will love you in return or do you love your enemies. Jesus said, "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. (Matt. 5:43-45, ESV)

In our culture, even if a pastor doesn't actually love people, he can still be considered successful as long as he is a gifted speaker, makes his congregation laugh, or prays for "all those poor, suffering people in the world" every Sunday. But Paul writes that even if "I have all faith so, as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing? (1 Cor. 13:2-3 ESV)."

How do you define success? It seems that nothing we do in this life will ever matter, unless it is about loving God and loving he people he has made.

Laugh Out Loud

If you want to know what people are really like, find out what makes them angry, what makes them weep, and what makes them laugh. The test isn’t infallible, but you’d be surprised how much it reveals. Warren Wiersbe, On Being a Servant of God, p.55.

Lately I’ve been in a battle. A battle not just for the heart but for my sense of humor. If you know me, you know that’s a big deal. I love to laugh but lately it’s been hard to find anything to laugh at. I’ve come to take myself and the things around me too serious. Not that things aren’t serious, they are, but here is the truth. God has not lost control. As a friend reminded me this week, the reality is…
• Jesus loves people way more than we do!
• He who began a good work in us will carry it on to completion! (Philippians 1:6)
• He has SO MUCH MORE in store for us than we can imgine! (Ephesians 3:20)
• He will reveal WHAT we need to know…WHEN we need to know it!
• He has a plan for our lives…and He is at work fulfilling it (Ephesians 2:10)
• If it is HIS WILL then it is HIS BILL…what the KING wants the KING pays for!!!
So laugh out loud because a merry heart is still the best medicine, Proverbs 17:22

I Never Imagined. . .

20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, Ephesians 3:20

I don’t know if I lack vision or if God just wants to surprise me, but most of what happens to me is more than I could even ask or imagine. Truth is I like it that way. I would hate for God to do only what I could ask for or imagine. So yesterday He “surprised” me again. He surprised me by doing a number of things that I couldn’t ask for or even imagine.

I never imagined. . .

• That people would find us on Easter, even though we were meeting at a different location.
• That we could consume 12 gallons of Starbucks coffee and 10 dozen Krispy Kreme in less than 15 minutes
• That volunteers would happily “move” the whole church from one location to another just for one service.
• That people would invite their family and friends to a church that didn’t have a building. . .and they would come!
• That my granddaughter (and her mom and dad) would visit on Easter so I could “show her off” to the church.
• That my wife would love God, me, and the ministry enough to stay up way past midnight to finish my PowerPoint.

But as good as that is I never imagined . . .

• That God would love me so much to send His son Jesus to became “what we are, so that He could make us what He is,” Isaiah 53:5
• And that I could have the opportunity each week to encourage others with the same encouragement that God encourages me with, 2 Corinthians 1:4

And most importantly I never imagined that

• the tomb is empty and HE IS ALIVE!